Because distance are not meant to be in between love. That empty space is where lies, negativity and loneliness fills without notice. It all comes from the yearning occur between those two lovers and it only fades as distance pass away. Fights, tears, hatred and scream will always be filled and it takes a true love to treat it as a highway of distance from one another. Because it is a fact. Without those things, there is no love as there is no road between those two lovers to love another. There's no more bound distance as they grew apart from one another, unbound.
Long-distance Relationship is a tough challenge where few lovers survive. Because they aren't bound together. They didn't care about the fights and tears. Because they treat those things as a big stone crashing their relationship. But the truth is, it is a rope of hope for them to always find a way to be together forever.
I've been into long distance relay. And I survived. We're still together after five months apart. You all must be laughing. Five months apart? Only? Really? Survived? Hahahaha. Well bitches I dare you to not meet him/her for a week and if you don't crack, him/her you're thinking about right now, isn't the one you really love.
The five months is a battle field for me. I realized that the only way of getting him home into my arms again is to argue and cry. I even fake it a few times just to see him walking towards me with a big smile on his face. Im not gonna lie, I miss those moments. I feel like we are complete. We love each other, we argue about stupid things, we cuddle, we laughed like never before, we ate a lot, we even stood still doing nothing but hold each others hands. How I miss the way we sat and I lay my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat.
As days passes by, he got his Pra-Diploma's result. And UPU's. I stopped breathing when I heard he's pursuing his studies at the same place he'd studied. Melaka. Infront of Starbucks at KLCC after we watched Callie in cinemas. I couldn't deny as I promise to myself I'll agree on what the decision is.
And right at this moment Im blogging this post, this story that came deep in my heart I realize, we're growing apart. As we trying to be happy and empty. Removing hatred and tears. A relationship without a rope.
I still remember you once told me, "presence of arguments tend to show the presence of love ". It's healthy for arguments to exist in our lives. Just like I said, it is a rope of hope for we to always find a way to be together forever. But now, we're denying and avoiding fights instead of solving it with love and care as it becomes a prove that we love each other. And with you keep avoiding, how can I feel that you still love me the way you used to?
I don't want to judge in not knowing how this will end. But Im here alone craving your attention. The attention you once gave me when we're apart for five months. I can't feel it now. And Im afraid I might starting to not care. Because your ears is the only place I want to express my feelings to, your arms is where I want to belong, your eyes I wanna gaze everyday for the rest of my life, your back where I want to hug when you carry me like a child, your hands to guide me the way, your heart to where I choose to stay. No one else I want to be with. But you.
